classic hotel demise: part 1

As I’m sitting here in my gigantic hotel room (not as nice as it sounds, I’ll explain soon), I decided this would be the perfect time to get off my lazy virtual arse and start this blog. I’ve had a few demands for a blog, mainly from my sister who finds many of the embarrassing moments or ridiculous happenings in my life entertaining, so I thought I would do the world a favor (I hope) and share them with everyone. So good luck folks.

So anyways back to my should-be-really-nice-but-actually-gross-hotel. I am currently residing in a hotel/casino in some rinky dink town outside of the Twin Cities. I’m showing a product for a pet show for the weekend (pet shows do exist, who knew?), mainly in hopes that I would get to snuggle and meet lots of furballs, while making $$$$ but that’s not exactly the case.Oh well. Anyways, I was feeling pretty special when they told me I would have my own room on the third floor. From the moment I checked in I was doomed. In a span of 10 minutes I entered a whirlwind of hotel hell

1. You have to be 21 to check into a hotel room. I, am not. This required me to call my boss out of dinner to come check me in, because of course he had nothing better to be doing.

2. I discovered I am staying in the smoking tower. I’m an asthmatic. Coughing and bloodshot eyes follow quickly.

3. I get in the room and throw myself onto the bed only to discover a GIANT disgusting stain on the comforter which could be anything, use your imagination. That’s what I did and it’s now in the corner of the room. Where it shall stay.

After I suffer these traumatic events, with more minor bumps along the way, I make it into bed, turn out the lights, close my eyes and head for dreamland only to be awakened by the screaming of two kids in the room next to me. How’d they know I didn’t feel like sleeping tonight?

Luckily the job and everything else has gone somewhat smoothly and this hotel has delicious food, which I am too broke to normally afford, so stains and all I have managed to survive. Judging by the noises coming from through the wall, satan’s little friends are back in their room and it’s time for me to get in bed and smother my head with a pillow.

Pray for me.